Alt-Right Graciously Accepts Role in Leslie Jones Twitter Battle

This past week actress and comedian (citation needed) Leslie Jones was the victim of a hacker’s cyber bullying.  Motivations remain unclear, but this evil, heartless, space aged, computer-Hitler could...
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This past week actress and comedian (citation needed) Leslie Jones was the victim of a hacker’s cyber bullying.  Motivations remain unclear, but this evil, heartless, space aged, computer-Hitler could have possibly been provoked by the banning of fabulous homosexual and Breitbart tech-editor, Milo Yiannopoulos from twitter after giving a bad review to the all female Ghostbusters remake starring Jones. Milo supporters were aggressively vocal in their approval of the review, to which Ms. Jones played up the victim role (if she was half as good in her role in Ghostbusters there would have been a sequel) and twitter moderators banned Milo.

 

A fair amount of displeasure has now been aimed at the right for mean spirited images posted on Ms. Jones’ personal website by the unknown hacker. Perhaps something people wanted to see less than an all female Ghostbusters remake, nude pictures of LesDogg have been released as well as photography containing Leslie in the physical act of love. There was also a butt-sex one. (My eyes. My fucking eyes.)

 

Seminal liberal celebs such as Katy Perry and Lena Dunham came out of the wood work to virtue signal their support and make the events fit their agenda:

 

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Even Hillary couldn’t pass up the chance to attach herself to the newsworthy harassment:

 

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We here at ProudBoy Magazine understand that tensions are high as Leslie Jones supporters look for someone to blame. Lucky, we have studied hours of footage of “Muslim Community Representatives” responding to actual violent attacks by Muslims and we are now prepared to give a response to the Leslie Jones hacking we believe our friends on the left will find acceptable.

 

(For proper effect, read the following like you’re being held hostage reading a ransom note)

 

As members of the alt-right, we here at ProudBoy Magazine condemn the hacking of Leslie Jones and are truly heartbroken. In this trying time we have to keep in mind that it is important for all members of the community to feel safe, especially good, law abiding conservatives.  The act perpetrated on Leslie Jones was illegal. Now is a time to remember not all conservatives are hackers. Also, we have no idea this hacker was a conservative, or even a Trump supporter. There is no evidence he even read Mr. Yiannopoulos’s review. The hacker very well could have just loved Ms. Jones’ unique brand of physical attributes so much he wanted to share it with the world. For all we know, the hacker could have also been a Hillary supporter.

 

Perhaps we’ll never know.

 

Perhaps we’ll never know.

 

One thing we do know is conservative, alt-right, pro-Trump, republican and libertarian ideologies preach peace. There will always be one or two bad apples, so the best strategy is to respect our beliefs, comply with our cultural needs, and learn to tolerate our differences so further Leslie Jones tragedies can be avoided.

 

Rest assured, if a fellow Proud Boy catches the dastardly hacker we will be happy to handle the matter internally, in a Sharia-like court system, that may excluded leftists, but we shall surely find appropriate consequences (that totally wouldn’t include laughter, high fives, and the buying of beers).

 

We may have our differences but one thing we can all agree on is nobody wanted to see those picture… especially the one with the tongue. The real question that should be asked here is:

 

 Who the hell asked for her to send these in the 1st place? What deranged mind dreamed up this fresh hell?  A cowardly act to say the least.

 

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PawL Bazile was born in Jersey City, New Jersey in 1984. He grew up in a middle-class suburban Italian American family and studied Theater Arts, Literature, and Filmmaking in New York City. He self educates in Science and History regularly. He made his 1st short film when he was 14 and received an honorable mention from Kean University. Since then he has written, produced and directed dozens of short films and completed an award winning feature length documentary LIVING THE AMERICAN NIGHTMARE (2011) with punk rock and metal legends including members of the Misfits, Bill Ward of Black Sabbath and Peter Steele of Type O Negative. Currently he is making the motorcycle documentary SAVAGE which will discuss the life of his murdered uncle. Pawl Bazile has performed comedy, poetry, and spoken word. He has also acted in films and appeared in plays off Broadway. PawL regularly contributes to SugarBuzz Magazine and is a regular contributor for Proud Boys Magazine. Pawl Bazile currently runs a media company called New Measure Productions and lives in a dangerous neighborhood.
  • One-Eye

    I valiantly avoided viewing the hacked images. But I believe I may have seen the phrase “looks like a stack of melted tyres” in regards to their aesthetic value.

    I imagine it’s a far cry from Bar Rafaeli shoving a curling iron up her ass.

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