I’ve just spent the last five minutes in literal fits of laughter. I’m sitting alone in my office and howling at this, frankly, astounding news.
Gawker is trying to ‘reclaim’ the term ‘cuck’.
The failing media company, which is said to be in settlement talks with Hulk Hogan, has gone full Poe’s Law and is literally launching a new men’s magazine entitled…The Cuck. This whole thing looks like something dreamed up by Anthony Cumia and Gavin McInnes. Are we being trolled? God I love 2016.
“What differentiates The Cuck from all those other men’s interest sites out there? We like to think it’s our emphasis on not being Bad. Unlike other men’s interest sites.”
Also we like to jack it in the corner while a bull plunges his superior cock into our beloved ones. You know, man stuff. The only funny thing about the project is how unfunny it is. Pareene took to Twitter to, sarcastically, ask for pitches.
very excited to launch this new pop-up microblog. please pitch me!!!!!! https://t.co/uW3g3eZIXT
— slackbot (@pareene) August 10, 2016
The Cuck also appears to be interested in men’s thoughts on ‘sex, dating, clothes, relationships, politics, sex and women. One could only assume that this is some kind of dig about men’s opinions on these issues being too commonplace already. Who knows. Maybe they’re being serious – maybe we’re going to be reading about how holding your girlfriends purse is good for the triceps.
The people over at Gawker are desperate to be loved, to be relevant and to be funny. They are none of those things, and they certainly don’t understand satire or ridicule. The Cuck is the equivalent of a bullied child at school, every day being called a ginger-headed faggot, proudly exclaiming in the middle of a packed dinner hall “YES, I AM A GINGER-HEADED FAGGOT!”
Gawker, thank you for making us laugh at you, not with you. I will not be reading this new site, nor will my wife or her son. That’s where I draw the line!